Ramblings
Saunterings
Ramblings: about North-West England
Ramblings is a set of articles about North-West England, of unknown authorship and
indeterminate date, believed to have been written for amusement on rainy days,
which are not unknown in North-West England.
6. Books for Offcomers
Tak Hod by Abraham Dodd
Because of the housing shortage in the Lake District it is necessary
to impose quotas on offcomers. From now on only those who
can show a deep knowledge of Cumbrian history and culture will
be allowed entry permits. In fulfilling my duty to help potential
offcomers with their preparatory reading I will make some
suggestions.
Here’s the first:
Tak Hod: The Definitive History of Cumbrian Wrestling, by Abraham
Dodd (Corinthian Books, £99.99), 612 pages with nearly 400 black
and white daguerreotypes, including a 236-page appendix giving
in full the revised rules of the Cumbrian Wrestling Authority, as
defined at the historic meeting in Cockermouth, 1889.
Cumbrian wrestling begins when the two wrestlers ‘tak hod’. If you
tak hod of this book you will be gripped by the mesmerising story
of Cumberland and Westmorland wrestling, from its introduction
by Viking invaders to its starring role at present-day fairs.
Revel in the exploits of Jason Greatgirdle, who, after winning
the all-comers title for thirty-four consecutive years in the nineteenth
century, retired undefeated with acute muscle fatigue after an epic
ten-hour draw with Charlie Craggfast. Wonder about the ethics of
the Aikriggs, who adapted sheep breeding methods to develop the
‘Aikrigg dynasty’ that reigned supreme for four generations. Be
amazed by the startling costumes worn by wrestlers through the
ages.
The author’s hands-on experience comes to the fore in the
illuminating chapters on the wrestling holds and moves, all three
of them. It is easy to underestimate the supreme technical skill of
champion wrestlers. They stand, legs braced, arms locked and
buttocks athwart, hardly moving for what seems like an eternity,
until suddenly, after a momentary lapse of concentration or loss of
balance, one of them is seen miraculously tumbled to the ground.
You are advised to follow assiduously the step-by-step
instructions given by Abraham Dodd, for if your knowledge of
Cumbria does not satisfy the examiners then your holds surely will.
Pen Your Pimp by Tom Bumfit
Pen Your Pimp, by Tom Bumfit (Strudelgate Press, £14.99), 235 pages
with 15 intricate pen-and-ink drawings. There is also a Pen Your
Pimp DVD (£14.99), showing all the manoeuvres in detail, with
commentary by Tom Bumfit.
Offcomers may be excessively excited by this title. In the
Cumbrian dialect, pimp is five (in the Keswick version: yan, tyan,
tethera, methera, pimp, ... ) when shepherds count their sheep.
And five sheep is the usual number penned in Cumbrian sheep-dog
trials. So, Pen Your Pimp is a description of the traditional Cumbrian
sport of sheep-dog trialling. This book presents all the rules and
techniques of trialling but the majority of readers will enjoy most
the anecdotes through which Tom Bumfit enlivens the text.
There was, for example, the controversial occasion when several
sheep-dogs were disqualified from the National Championships for being colour-prejudiced.
They had been trained only with white sheep. If, in the competition, the dogs were presented
with five sheep one of whom happened to be black then they were flummoxed.
They sometimes penned only the four white sheep and left the black sheep out.
The judges realised that this would not look good on One Man and His Dog
and promptly banned the dogs. The dog owners duly objected, arguing that there was
nothing in the rules to stop them insisting on only white sheep.
The judges banned them too for being colour-prejudiced.
In another chapter, Bumfit explains whistling techniques via the story
of the ventriloquial whistler who disrupted many trials in the
1970s. Several sheep-dogs, not to mention their handlers, became
permanently depressed as a result of the antics of the ventriloquial
whistler. He was only identified in 1978 after a detailed statistical
analysis of the results of the previous decade. It was realised that
the culprit could not ventriloquially whistle his own dog and that
he would probably resort to this practice only after an unsuccessful
run of his own. He was hounded out of Cumbria.
Photos:
Synchronised Cumbrian Wrestling.
Cumbrian Wrestling, a sport for everyone, today.
Dog and pimp.
Comments:
• That's a fine photo of synchronised wrestling.
Cumbrian wrestlers were a
favourite subject for pioneering photographers because their stances,
often maintained for hours, were ideal for the long exposures that
the first cameras required.
• When necessary, counting continued as follows:
sethera, lethers, hovera, dovera, dick, yan-a-dick, tyan-a-dick, tether-a-dick,
mether-a-dick, bumfit, yan-a-bumfit, tyan-a-bumfit, tether-a-bumfit, mether-a-bumfit,
giggot. The author, Tom Bumfit, was therefore 15.
Ramblings
Saunterings
© John Self, Drakkar Press, 2024-
Top photo: Rainbow over Kisdon in Swaledale;
Bottom photo: Ullswater